Too much time to think

A side effect of running sound is that you have plenty of time to think. I’ll be honest the more I contemplate the state of affairs the world and society are in, the more I can understand suicide. Not that I would, but I can’t really fault someone for wanting to. Like the guy who laid down on the subway tracks the other day. Maybe Camus is right in that the greatest absurdity is that in the face of sheer defeat we don’t kill ourselves, rather we push forward and keep trying. Well this was dark. Yet, most of my thoughts on this matter tend to be dark.

Honestly I just want to opt out of the whole mess. I just want to not generate anymore negative karma.

tinycartridge

tinycartridge:

How does it feel being the new Pokémon Champion? ⊟

16 days, 7 hours, 45 minutes, and 33 seconds later, it’s finally over.. There’s a lot of fanart commemorating the end of Twitch Plays Pokémon, but this one from Kiyokon is my favorite.

Here are more pieces that I saw reblogged on Hatsuu’s Tumblr: Xie, Garmmy, Renee, and Melanie.

BUY Pokemon X and Y, upcoming games

Beautiful post

All my favorite bands are Finnish

I guess a trip to Helsinki should be in my future. I wish it was sooner than later but I know I can’t afford it till later. I realized that once my student loans are paid off in 2019 I’ll be effectively getting a $6k a year boost in income. That should make my wander lust easier. At least I hope. Probably not. I seems to me once I’m done saving up for one thing, a new thing to save up for appears. It honestly stresses me out. I would like just to spend a few months paying off my credit cards (thus increasing my income) or just enjoying the cash. Money in general stresses me out. I have to work on my relationship with it.

Speaking of eastern Europe this whole Ukraine thing is starting to get out of hand. Well, the revolt was pretty crazy but it was until today a civil war. Now the Russian federation has entered as a potential belligerent. I hope we don’t start a war with them. Let them take back the Crimea. Why should we get involved? That area is Sympathetic to the Russians anyway.

The problem is have with a coworker I think has been sorted out. We just don’t talk or acknowledge the others presence. There was a terrible tension in the room on Thursday. Today was not as bad. I rarely have a dire hatred of another person. Yet, the interactions I have with them just burn me up. They were a temp, and they’re not getting a full time position. I have to “be nice”to them to prevent complaints of retaliation. I don’t get this way often. This way being angry and feeling justified in taking action against what offends me. Yet, in the last few years when I do, I can’t do anything about it. It’s that sense of powerless, of “why the fuck can’t I lash out at shit. Everyone else gets to.” It’s as if my life’s situation force me to take a more Buddhist path on things. Typically when I do things go well. I know I should do that more. I type on here all the time that I need to meditate more. Right now, I just think I need to sleep more.

Tonight a person reacted to me like I was a creeper/potential rapist. I get it, I understand why someone would act defensive seeing me walk down the street. It’s NYC they did the right thing. Still, seeing them pull to the side, clutch their purse as if they were going to pull out mace/or prevent you from snatching it, and telling you to “go.” When all you are doing is walking home from the train station. It does suck.

A rant

Stop being so fucking sanctimonious. “Protecting their Human rights” is just liberal imperialism. Just like “political correctness” is just liberal censorship. I’ve been liberal or left leaning most of my adult life. I’m just getting tired of fucking double speak. Call shit what it is and own your words.